Vellai Mozhi – Frankly Speaking is a powerful first-person account of a hijra-thirunangai-transfeminine experience in southern India. A. Revathi enacts her life as a Tamil trans woman, stringing stories about finding community, navigating family relationships, encountering violence, building solidarities, finding and losing love, and discovering the joys of writing and performing. A. Revathi previewed the upcoming April 18 event, which will be performed in Tamil with English subtitles, for us in the Q&A below.
The event is hosted by the Department of South Asian Studies, the Department of the History of Art and Achitecture, the Mittal Institute, and is supported by a grant from the Elson Family Arts Initiative.
Mittal Institute: Thank you, A. Revathi, for speaking with us! Where did you grow up and how did you find your way into performance art?
A. Revathi: I was born into a farming family in Tamil Nadu with three older brothers and a sister. I am the youngest and my parents named me Duraisami. Because I was the youngest son, my father showered me with affection. Due to my family circumstances then I wasn’t able to study past tenth grade. Because my family and others didn’t understand or respect my female feelings, I ran away to Delhi, Bombay, and Bangalore in search of other people like me. At that time, I struggled to make a living and faced a lot of difficulties and cruelty.
In 1999, I was introduced to a non-profit organization called Sangama in Bangalore and started working there as an office assistant. By 2008, I had become the director and worked ceaselessly in the fight for the rights of gender and sexuality minorities in South India. I also began writing books at this time. My autobiography Vellai Mozhi was published in South Indian languages as well as in English and has since been used in hundreds of college and university syllabi worldwide, which is how I became known globally.
A. Revathi performs Vellai Mozhi – Frankly Speaking. Photo by Sibi Pulpally.
Vellai Mozhi was published under the title Baduku Bayulu in Kannada in 2011, and the drama group Janamana Datta from Karnataka got my consent to perform parts of it as a play. When I went to see it for the first time it was their 49th performance, and I got goosebumps as I watched my life experiences play out before my eyes. That is when I realized how immediately theater can touch the hearts of the public. That drama group included me in their work, and I began educating people through the arts. Subsequently, there were over 100 stage performances of Baduku Bayulu across Karnataka from 2013 to 2014.
Since then, I have been acting Vellai Mozhi as a Tamil monologue in India and abroad and have completed 112 stage performances to date. I am currently conducting this drama for public school students across Tamil Nadu. Along with sharing my experiences with the students and instilling within them a sense of the importance of education, I create an environment in the minds of the students in which there is no differentiation based on caste, religion, or race.
A. Revathi performs Vellai Mozhi – Frankly Speaking. Photos by Abhijit P.
I am also currently working as a full-time actor and have participated in other productions and performances. Even though there isn’t much money to be made in this field, the work satisfies my soul. I am doing more than just telling my story; by educating people with art in the service of others, I am doing what I can to make life better for future generations. In my view, art is a powerful tool that can be used to make people think.
I am doing more than just telling my story; by educating people with art in the service of others, I am doing what I can to make life better for future generations. In my view, art is a powerful tool that can be used to make people think.
Mittal Institute: Can you talk to us about your life as a Tamil trans woman? When did you decide to share this part of yourself with family and friends?
A. Revathi: In the past, life was rough. I have been subjected to discrimination, ostracism, and violence. And because I was born a boy, I would only be considered an equal partner in the family and have inheritance rights if I remained one. My family viewed my gender change as shameful and something that ruined our family honor.
I realized as a child that I could not share my true feelings with anyone, as there was no awareness about gender identity in schools or society. I had questions about whether or not it was okay for me to be like this. I felt guilty. The only time society recognized my femininity was when I dressed in female costumes during festivals or school functions; however, even then it was only seen as a disguise. Nobody understood that was who I truly was.
I left home in 1985 and went to Delhi where I joined my transgender community and began living as a woman. My family discovered this, brought me back to Tamil Nadu, cruelly shaved my long hair and forced me to live as a man. Even then, I couldn’t share my true feelings. I left home again and went to Mumbai where I underwent gender affirming surgery. Only after this did I find the courage to speak openly about my feelings. However, my family accepted me only conditionally.
This identity was a real problem for all trans women and men in India. In the beginning it was a real struggle for us who were in hiding to live openly transgender lives with rights. The work began through poetry, essays, performances, and seminars and conferences in colleges and universities. And now, the high courts and supreme courts have decreed that it is the government’s responsibility to safeguard transgender identities and rights for both trans men and women. They have also instituted public and workplace anti-discrimination laws. Even though these laws are favorable, society has not fully embraced them, especially families. The atrocities of violence, discrimination, and murder are still being perpetrated against trans people.
Mittal Institute: How have things changed in recent years for trans people in India?
A. Revathi: Today, even though the law states that trans men and women have voting rights, a pension for the elderly, a small fund for self-employment, subsidized housing, and reserved seats in schools and colleges, many difficulties arise when it comes to people accepting and actually implementing these policies. For example, when you write “sugar” on a piece of paper, does that make it taste sweet? It’s only when you give someone sugar that they can taste sweetness. This is the current situation. There is a constant need to follow up with the courts, and I can count on one hand the number of transgender people who are working in police departments, hospitals, and corporations. Most transgender people still beg and do sex work for a living. And there is little money left for savings once they have paid dues in the community, given police bribes, and taken care of living expenses. Rowdies regularly extract money as well.
We need to keep fighting for our identity and job opportunities, from the level of the family to the courts. Even today, I see our identity as being a very important and challenging matter. When I was born and lived as a male, society said that I was too feminine. Now, after fully transforming into a woman, society says I am too manly. We are even facing complications and challenges getting identity cards and passports. Living in this kind of society is still a real challenge.
We need to keep fighting for our identity and job opportunities, from the level of the family to the court.
Mittal Institute: If you could go back and speak to your younger self, what advice would you give?
A. Revathi: Society will only respect trans men and women if we are educated. Therefore, continue your studies where you left off. And even if the government is slow in implementing the court directives that benefit us, activists like me are here for you.
We are working for you to study and excel without obstacles, just as you are. After studying you should become a doctor, judge, lawyer, or collector. Do not discriminate against those in society who have discriminated against us, but rather claim your sovereignty and give back. Only then will there be a way for us to live equally in society. Education is important for this to happen, which is why I’m stressing its importance.
Mittal Institute: What can attendees expect at your upcoming performance, “Vellai Mozhi – Frankly Speaking”? What is one main message that you hope to share with your audience?
A. Revathi: Even if viewers do nothing to directly help the trans community, it doesn’t matter. My expectation is that the audience will view and respect us as human beings with feelings. For me, it is enough if you perceive us as friend, companion, mother, sister, brother, or child.
And if your child, sibling, or acquaintance happens to be a transgender man or woman, treat them without discrimination as you would any other man or woman. That is enough. If every family accepts us, then that means the whole town does too. And if every town accepts us, so does the district. And if every district accepts us, that is the same as the state accepting us. And if every state accepts us, then the whole country does, too.
My art teaches that you can contribute to transgender equality by giving us the equal rights and respect we deserve, and letting us live our lives, just as we are.
☆ The views represented herein are those of the interview subjects and do not necessarily reflect the views of LMSAI, its staff, or its steering committee.